Ladies Mile ... Day 1

The shiny new fluro vest, and the alert stance can only mean one thing.

We have a new crew member, fresh out of lollypop school.

To direct and control traffic you must hold a basic Traffic Controllers ticket.

It looks an easy job, and if the traffic is light and it's a nice day it can be quite pleasant.

It can also be cold, tiring, and mind numbingly boring.

It is also important. She is protecting our arses.

We are insured on the job, I could collect a hundred grand.

I 'm not keen though because you have to be dead.

Women are especially good on the stop/go, in my experience anyway.

An impatient late truck driver will happily wait for them, but snarl at me.

Funny That ...

On The Lollypop

Impatient drivers are the curse of Traffic Controllers at road works ...

Under The Weight ...

Some of us live under crushing responsibility.

Some people notice ...

"... it occurred to me that I was putting a lot of trust in this man's ability to ensure that oncoming traffic had temporarily surrendered this lane to me. If you figure the typical car is worth around $15,000, and this guy shepherds maybe 250 thru during his shift, then he is responsible for protecting assets worth about $3.7 million. Google tells me a road worker makes about $100 per day, so he is managing assets worth 38,000 times his annual salary."


And in the rain too...

Behind The Lollypop

Behind you a bunch of guys are putting in a crash barrier.
This is the view you have from behind the lollypop.

There are signs up around the corner, Men Working, A "Flagman" & a 30k speed limit.

Everything is totally legal.

Your safety is really totally reliant on people obeying the signs.
If they come smoking around that corner, half asleep or on a cell phone you are at real risk.
Especially if a truck & trailer unit are heading away from you and obscuring the oncoming drivers view a bit more.

The thing is, it happens.
A car will hurtle around a corner and when you give him/her an earful, will swear there are no signs.

Which is why you can be a bit jumpy.

The Lust for Bar Stools

If you on the Stop/Go Lollypop, the first half hour is a doddle.
After an hour the feet start protesting mildly.
After 2 hours you realise with horror, you have only been there 2 hours.

From now on you would kill for a bar stool.

By Noon you have an over powering urge to get horizontal
An ant, crawling across the road can become huge entertainment.

By the end of the day you are homicidal.

Anyone now passing by and saying "That looks like a good job" is at real risk

In my opinion, it is the worst job on the road.

It Sucks ...

Power Of The Paddle.

So you are on traffic control at an accident site.
There is a chance to let banked up traffic through. You have to cut it off somewhere though.
My mate at the other end does.
When eventually he lets another lot through, who had he stopped...

The Associate Minister of Energy.

*snigger*

Feel The Power

I remember reading an interview in the paper, where a top business mogul in charge of a zillion dollar enterprise was asked if there was anything else in life he fancied doing.
"Stop & Go man", he said, "For a true feeling of power".
Well he is welcome to our reality show.
Torrential rain, a howling gale straight off the mountain, umbrella unable to cope, and a lot of expensive hired machinery working, so no hope of a knock off.
I bravely took this shot through the truck windscreen, heater on full blast.
Rest Area 300m

Clumps, Thumps, & Lollypops.

Some days traffic control is a breeze. The traffic flows steadily and smoothly, people are in a good mood, the day is sunny, and there is enough going on to keep you interested. Today was not one of those days. It is a long weekend in Taranaki and there are all sorts of events on, the biggest being WOMAD. We have X number of stabilizing sites to finish before the sealing crew hits them tomorrow. We were a truck short due to some doddery old dude putting it on it's side yesterday. For my sins I volunteered to man the lollypop & radio. The traffic heading south to New Plymouth was an eclectic stream of hippyish vans, old buses, sports cars, and flash sedans. The traffic heading north was the more usual dad, mum & kids, with holiday gear, cars towing boats, caravans, and pissed off business reps heading back to Auckland.
It was two woman gossiping that nearly killed me. You could see it coming. A car coming straight on, through the signs, driver on autopilot, yakking flat out. We had a roller and loader across the road, and several men marking out the road. No way can you let a car through. I dived forward and hung the lollypop in front of the oncoming windscreen. Realization dawned and the wheels locked up. The two cars following took evasive action, one skidding off the road and ended up where I had been standing.
I marched to the window and gave the white faced driver an earful. "You stupid woman! You could have killed my mates, it's a 30 k speed limit" etc.etc. A tirade of abuse also came from the cars behind. "I'm truly sorry.... I really am" . Flustered she stalled the car when she went through, to cop another earbashing from startled workmates who heard the skidding tires. It is a sound you don't want to hear on a worksite.
The rest of the day the traffic still seemed schitzoid, travelling too fast, too close, and in thirty car bunches. It was not a nice day on the road.

Lollypops and Beamers.

So you have done your course as a Traffic Controller (TC) Have been handed the sacred Stop/Go sign, and wearing your fluoro vest you do your first day on the lollypop. You are in for a few surprises. The number of drivers who will not see you till the last moment is one of the first. Despite warning signs and a strategic position you have to keep your wits about you. This is especially true of holidays, and I can only put it down to the "driving on automatic pilot" syndrome by drivers intent on getting somewhere, and not attuned to what is going on around them, In short Fuckwits. They will kill you are not careful .
   Tourists are ones to watch, I have literally had to whack a car with a stop sign to get it to stop at an accident site, when a car load of asian tourists sped towards firemen working on a car .
   The ones that really piss you off though, are those who are so important, and who's business is so vital, will try and intimidate you into letting them through a worksite immediately. They nearly always drive BMW's. After waiting a good 10 seconds fingers drumming on the steering wheel, the window will slide down and an annoyed " Will there be a long wait?". We are told to be courteous and polite, so my response is often to reply with another question. "Do you think we will have a warm winter?" or somesuch, it seems to baffle them for a while.
   If it is late in the day, your legs and feet are aching from prolonged standing, the novelty has long gone, and the most exciting thing around you is watching the progress of a small beetle across the road, it is especially difficult to be courteous and polite. I have heard of one legend amoungst lollypop operators who after an altercation, and a "What are you going to do about it......" calmly opened the drivers door, pulled him to his feet, whacked him in the mouth, and put him back in the car and closed the door.
   Most drivers though are friendly and understand that you are doing a job. Some will give you toffees, mints, a bag of fruit, at least a smile and wave. Guess who goes first.
   We try and let trucks through as a priority, starting a large truck from rest is a hassle, and if it is a steep hill dangerous, if you know you are coming up on road works you are better off behind a truck rather than in front of it.
   And always remember that we are all communicating by radio, so piss off the lollypopper and maybe the watercart will forget to turn off his nozzles, or a little tar/cement could end up on your car.

On a shitty day, even the mind goes numb, feet swell, legs ache, wet weather gear goes clammy. It pays to keep an eye out for Stock Trucks that can litterally shower you with shit.