Rest Area 300m: April 2006

Sunday, April 30, 2006

The Landfill

Another one for the crusher.

It's often worth checking out the recycling shop on the way out

Purveyors of fine kitchen and laundry appliances.
(by appointment to Fart Towers)

Friday, April 28, 2006


click for bigger

National Bank
Mt Messenger Branch

I have a suspicion there is a story behind this ...

Tired Flock

click for bigger

Te Kuiti Landfill

Thursday, April 27, 2006

A Minor Post

Bargain Of The Week
Te Kuiti Landfill.


One of our more tasteful rest areas has a new resident.
He doing quite well for himself too.

He is obviously experienced at dealing with the poultry paparazzi, and ducked as the camera clicked.

We think he has come from another rest area and was taken for a ride. Either that or he has walked 50 kilometres.

Anyway, in the spirit of personal potholes, what could we call him but Spike! (one of my most prolific crowers commenters)

When I left he was dining on venison sausage and cold chips, and looking rather smug...

Wednesday, April 26, 2006

Who Ya Gonna Call ...

Once again it was like a horror movie.

Soubriquet reports via WNBC on another attack
This time on a 71 year old man in Huntington, N.Y.

"He yelled for his wife, Louise, to help him, and she threw a rope and called their son, Dan, who lives with them.

"Oh, my God," the wife said. "A little more, he's sinking. He's a goner!"

The son said the scene "was like a horror picture."

A neighbor who heard the commotion ran over to help -- but the ground gave way again, swallowing him and the son. The neighbor crawled out while passers-by tried to hold onto the others until the Huntington Fire Department showed up."

Now at first I thought this and the prior attack posted below were the work of Moleman.
But this is getting more serious.

I think that the secret Pothole breeding experiments at Area 51 have been going well.

I believe that attempts to breed a giant hole to attack Tora Bora have borne fruit.
But one has escaped.

And it is hungry ...


Tuesday, April 25, 2006

Killer Pothole Gets Man In Home

"Man dies after plummeting into large hole that opened beneath his home"

"ALTA, California (AP) - It was like a scene from a horror film: A 27-year-old man plummeted into a gaping hole that suddenly opened beneath a house, trapping him beneath foundation rubble and killing him."

You have to watch them when they go rogue...


A Fine Lady

Rod from Banbury sent me this.
(click 4 bigger)

I asked him if he lived anywhere near the Fine Lady upon a white horse...

"Ride a cock horse to Banbury Cross
To see a fine lady upon a white horse
With rings on her fingers and bells on her toes
She shall have music wherever she goes"
(interesting origin)

He does, and says they are very proud of it.
It's only been up a year.

I really like it.

Monday, April 24, 2006

"Steady In The Ranks There ...."

I seem to have a small scale Email & comments riot breaking out.

"ME ME ME!" you cry

Right You Lot

"Our Sovereign Lord the King chargeth and commandeth all persons being assembled immediately to disperse themselves, and peaceably to depart to their habitations or to their lawful business, upon the pains contained in the act made in the first year of King George for preventing tumultuous and riotous assemblies. God save the King."

You Have now been read the Riot Act

There will be no shortage of potholes this winter

Settle Down.

Sunday, April 23, 2006

A Passer By ...

I get a lot of rather strange visitors to this site...
Camilla is one
"She is a Black Sex Link and a sweety"

It's OK, no Nubian R18 fantasies here,
Just, um, Tastefulness.

Oh and turn up the volume ...


At Readiness...

I've had to get a bit of back-up for the great Pesonalised Pothole hunt.
A mobile snapper unit is on the road.

I have a team of Crack mechanics preparing the Fartcopter.

All is in readiness...

Saturday, April 22, 2006

Hole In One

I was pondering the sliding share price the other day.

What I need apparently are links, lots of links.

Linkers to this magnificent site, will now be in a weekly draw for....

Your own, exclusive, antipodean pothole....

How cool would that be.

Yes, from now on, linked whanau shall have a crack at their own exclusively named pothole.

Your very own pothole, picked by independent daughter, shall be posted every week (or so)
photo updates, health, wholesome type road remedies, the whole 9 yards...

For those of you on senior net, or don't know what the fuck is going on here, just blogroll/bookmark me.
(Restarea 300m has a non-ageist, Home for the befuddled philosophy ...

The Inaugural Pothole, ( A Web First!) is the Sticker Hole.

The Bill Sticker Hole is located on the top of Mt Messenger, and lives where trucks pull over and brake heavily, It has a bit of world weariness about it.....

This could have been yours....

So Thanks For The Comments...

So I was coming home the other day.
Hands & knees material,
And I saw something, and I thought "Blog Material".
Then I thought "You poor sad bastard".

Friday, April 21, 2006

Does Zig Zag Too ...

Stupid Things I've Done (27) THUMP

BOOF Gone half the THUMP cost of a;
BOOF Super THUMP Sub Bass BOOF Stereo THUMP with my daughter. THUMP BOOF.


Honest Dod's Used Cars ...

When a car dies these days, a lot of people just walk away from them.
Dead cars are just a hassle.

This one is now on the back of my truck and bound for the crusher.

A pile of water bottles probably means it has been overheated and cooked.
After just a couple of days, some yahoo's had smashed the windows, another day and it might have been torched.

Volunteer firemen just love being called out in the middle of the night for bugger all.

Efforts will be made to recover costs, but I wouldn't bet on a successful result.

Thursday, April 20, 2006

The Pale Rider

Mokau River Mist
This Morning.

There is a delightful Maori word that means bored, or tired of, - it is Hoha (audio speakers on!)
(It is supposed to have those dinky dots over the vowels, but I am to knackered to figure out how to do it ...)

Well I am bloody hoha with stabilising and it's cement and lime dust.

I come home looking like something from the crypt, all white and haggard.

Then if you got a very startled hedgehog, sprayed it with hair spray, then dusted it with icing sugar, you would have some idea of how the fine Fart facial features look.

And my truck ... *sob*
That's as bad.

Wednesday, April 19, 2006

Rural Wasteland.

Now a nice man called Rod, is getting a bit sick of our scenery.

" ...please, for those of us who have to work in an office all day couldn't you perhaps show us a photo of a horrible bit of NZ, just to prove that there is such a thing. Go on, you must have the odd industrial estate or something of the like!

The photo of the appalling rural wasteland above, is taken from the front verandah of the previous Fart residence.
Obviously, we had to move from such a crowded environment. I mean you can nearly see the neighbours...

Here we have a much better scene of some lovely sheds at our depot in New Plymouth. I apologise for the big ugly pile of dirt in the background. (Mt Taranaki, or Mt Egmont as our English forebears lovingly called it...)

Tuesday, April 18, 2006


Monday, April 17, 2006

A Little Enthusiasm Please ...

Well so far all is quiet on the Fart front.

The traffic seems to be behaving itself, and so has the road.

Now get back to work you lot ...

Saturday, April 15, 2006

Oh, and happy Easter ...

A Virtual Time Waster

Take your virtual car for a spin, down a virtual highway, complete with potholes.
Mind the virtual cop.

They still seem to be arguing about virtual road signs though ...

"Highways link stolen from the brilliant Plep"

The Runaway

Colin McCone wasn't like his fellows.

He always wanted to be an art object.

At the moment he is living with some Ponga carvings, near Awakino.

He seems happy ...

Friday, April 14, 2006

On The Lollypop

Impatient drivers are the curse of Traffic Controllers at road works ...

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Thursday, April 13, 2006

"Gentlemen, Start Your Engines ..."

It's a long weekend.

We have prepared for the coming carnage.

Anytime now the flag will drop and the holidaymakers will hurtle toward our stretch of Highway, drunk at the prospect of a few days of leisure.

Now one gets jumpy when the phone rings ...

Beat The Fuss, Go By Bus

I want one of these...

A mere $US850,000 and away you go.

Plasma TV's, Cat diesel, all the bells and whistles

Wednesday, April 12, 2006

Invasion Alert

It's getting a bit nippier at nights.
The mice are moving in.

I don't so much mind them partying up in the kitchen
But they have found my easter egg stash.

Total war has been declared.
This time they have gone too far ...

illustration Lisa Horstman

Testing ... Testing...

The Certificate Of Fitness (COF) examination on trucks is thorough, as it should be.

It is far more detailed than similar checks on light vehicles.

Examiners peer into every nook and cranny, run brake tests on high tech machine's, check the chassis for cracks, and generally crawl all over it.

Heavy trucks are often driven around the clock, by drivers on shifts, and can do the average annual NZ car mileage (14-16000k's) in a couple of weeks.
I don't do anything like that pottering around the Queen's Highways, I've done 30,000 in 6 months.

All was good, and away I went with a clean bill of health and a new sticker.

Tuesday, April 11, 2006

A Possible Link ...

Where there's muck, there's brass ...

"In a crime that stinks, thieves are stealing bags of horse manure from Richmond Riding for the Disabled.

Vice-president George Campbell said more than 100 bags of the manure, which is sold to raise funds for the charitable organisation, had been stolen this year.

"It's not that expensive but it's 100 bags - that's $150. That would get about 30 bales of hay, which would feed our horses for a fortnight."

The thieves would have needed a trailer or a truck, as some of the bags were quite heavy, he said.

"We're not going to run out of it. We've got an ongoing supply but it does help with our running costs."

Stuff NZ

Fuel Saving Tip 42

Always wear sensible shoes ...

This could actually be a shot of our workshop foreman's new twin start device as fitted to his scooter ...

Memo to Workshop

You will be excited to hear my oil change is due.

Please make sure that the finest oils are in readiness.

These should be made from only the purest organic free range dinosaurs.

The grease gun should be charged with a premium product and lightly warmed before being applied to nipples.

The usual fingernail inspection will apply.

In anticipation etc.

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Monday, April 10, 2006

These Days ...

A safe work environment is essential

& similar

Sunday, April 09, 2006

Under The Weight ...

Some of us live under crushing responsibility.

Some people notice ...

"... it occurred to me that I was putting a lot of trust in this man's ability to ensure that oncoming traffic had temporarily surrendered this lane to me. If you figure the typical car is worth around $15,000, and this guy shepherds maybe 250 thru during his shift, then he is responsible for protecting assets worth about $3.7 million. Google tells me a road worker makes about $100 per day, so he is managing assets worth 38,000 times his annual salary."

And in the rain too...

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Southbound Usual Corner...

I live on a corner that see's a fair bit of action.
Usually in the weekends.
It's a fairly well practised drill now.

Ensure emergency services are alerted
Stop well meaning people from getting skittled.
Get some warning out from the corner.
Grab a few names & addresses for the police
Text the missus for coffee if it looks like a long one.

Then before the Fire Engine is back at the station, post a piccy.


Saturday, April 08, 2006

Blacktop Bible

Some Great Bedside Reading

(make your own!)
stolen from The Presurfer

Bashit & Hackit & Co

Another quality conversion

Friday, April 07, 2006

Tree Down

A Tawa tree came down in the Awakino Gorge this morning.
This one, rotten at the base, fell at a reasonable hour.

A truck hit the head of the tree and suffered a bit of damage, but in doing so smashed enough room for traffic to get through.

We pushed it off the road, cut it into managable bits and hauled it away.

Tawa is great firewood, splits easily, and is one of the only NZ native timbers that will burn green.
Good that ...


Thursday, April 06, 2006

Arty Farty Stuff

click for bigger

The spray truck driver's boots ...

Pace & Grace

click for bigger

This definitely looks a speedy beast.
I especially love the pose of the front passenger.

Wednesday, April 05, 2006

Lost & Found

A rather lost looking individual stopped one of our guys on Monday.
He had crashed his car on the weekend, then couldn't remember where.
Must have been a good party.

The cone is a giveaway in the photo.
It has been found.
It is a sign to us and others, that something has been seen.

In the willows you can see the missing car.

They are weedy looking trees, but it has unerringly found a big stump
and looks rather bent and sad.

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Pin The Tail

Donkeys 'better companions' than housewives

"A textbook used at schools in the Indian state of Rajasthan compares housewives to donkeys and suggests the animals make better companions as they complain less and are more loyal to their "masters", the Times of India reported."

I'm saying Nothing ...

Male. Lives in New Zealand/North Island/The Road, speaks English. Eye color is blue.
This is my blogchalk:
New Zealand, North Island, The Road, English, Male.

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