Rest Area 300m: November 2005

Wednesday, November 30, 2005

It's Hot at the moment.
Bloody Hot.
We are spending most afternoons dealing with bleeding tar.
Shovelling grit in the hot sun is hard work
I'm knackered.

Monday, November 28, 2005

Places We Have Lunch (10)

Awakino River Bank
(wild mint in foreground)


Mirror, Mirror,

One of the more important fittings on a truck are the mirrors.
We are backing into tight places, pulling into impossible off road parking spots, and keeping an eye on the back wheels so that we don't get stuck.

I hate these mirrors. They are convex.

They distort your perception of distance.

If you are backing up to something you can align the truck beautifully, but have no idea of how far away you are from your target.

I want some flat mirrors!

If you are reading this at our workshop, I have some very revealing photo's which could be published to the web, and a few choice embarrassing tales...

Not that I would ever resort to blackmail...

The Camera never lies....

Says it all really ...

Sunday, November 27, 2005

Pull Up! ... Pull Up!

So we are cruising along at a couple of hundred hits a day.

Suddenly ... Mt. Hanan!

What A Pickle!

Saturday, November 26, 2005

Rachel Hangs Up Her Bra....

MODEL Rachel Hunter's lingerie contract with the creators of the Ultimo Bra will not be renewed when it runs out next year, it was announced yesterday.
MJM International said it wanted to end its work with Rod Stewart's estranged wife "on a high" after two years.
The Glasgow-based firm provoked a row when it signed up Hunter, 36, last year after dumping the rock star's fiance, Penny Lancaster.
The winter catalogue will be her final job with the company before her contract runs out in February.

Some, ... on the way to work...Pix

clicky for bigger ...

North Taranaki Coast from Tongaporutu.

Looking South.

And I see they are fishing the morning tide.

Friday, November 25, 2005

Haulin' Ass

Chase that donkey!

Four cop cars took over an hour to catch a gang of teenage thieves who had escaped on a cart pulled by a donkey.

Officers from the Greek town of Patras said they were unable to keep up with the donkey which the boys steered down the old town's winding streets and narrow alleyways.

The chase, which one eyewitness described as "unbelievable", only came to an end an hour later when the young thieves, aged between 13 and 15 turned into a dead end.

Police caught the trio with a safe stolen from the local hospital on the back of their cart.

Ananova News via A Welsh View

Snap, ...Crackle, ... Pop !

Being older than dirt, and hooning around in cars before the transistor, to have a radio in a car was incredibly cool

If you had a radio in your wheels, the girls would tend to overlook your spots.

They were valve jobs, and used so much power that to run them for more than a few minutes while parked up meant a flat battery.
They hummed, and glowed and squealed.
The radio did too.

The ultimate bra popper, was a record player. You "posted" a 45rpm record into the slot and it would give you a glorious LoFi rendering of Pat Boone, or Conway Twitty.

A bottle of cheap sherry, a few 45's and a bunch of extra car batteries, and the world was yours.

Now I suppose. you plug into the same Ipod.

But the shuffling isn't the same.....

Thursday, November 24, 2005

Cops Balls Up

A motor cyclist blamed poor quality fuel and gravity for injuring a crack German masochist squad this week.
"It was a total Balls Up," Officer Crackemnutz said.
Female replacements refused to perform the grand finale, " I asked Them", Officer Hertzalot said, " But they crack up."


Wednesday, November 23, 2005

Surface Tension

Taranaki Daily News
"Road surface linked to crash
23 November 2005


The section of road north of Urenui where a truck crashed on Monday, spilling a load of urea, has been reduced to a 50km/h speed zone after police investigated the accident.
The accident occurred about 5km north of Urenui, blocking one lane of the state highway for 90 minutes.
The truck driver was taken to Taranaki Base Hospital with minor injuries.
Highway Patrol Sergeant Stephen Richardson said Transit NZ and crash inspectors had found the road's surface was not up to a safe standard and had reduced the speed limit accordingly.
"We want all motorists using that area of road to take note of the new speed limit to prevent anyone else crashing," he said.
A number of other drivers had also brought the problem to the attention of police following this week's accident.
Mr Richardson hoped the area of road would be fixed within a fortnight.
He would not say if the state of the road would have an influence on whether the driver of the urea truck would be charged"

This corner is an interesting one.
In winter you have to be careful of ice.
It is at the end of a long straight and turns and descends at the same time.
It can get slippery.
Personally having seen where the truck hit the bank before the corner, I doubt that the road had anything to do with it.

The clean up task at an accident like this can be monumental.
A sucker truck will pick up the load so it does not get into the nearby river.

Fuel contaminated soil will be scraped up and taken away.
The area will be swept with a broom tractor.
While we are there we will get the area ready to be resealed, so the speed limit can then be lifted.

Monday, November 21, 2005


In strict secrecy, the Green Party have been testing an environmentally friendly Formula 1 racing car.

Featuring a naturally aspirated engine, and free range gear box, initial testing has seen speeds of over 200kph on a diet of organic chicken manure.

Public unveiling has been delayed due to nesting sparrows and a dormant hedgehog.


My Dirty Girl

I am still madly in love with my new truck.
I wash my truck every chance I get.
I polish my truck when we have down time.
I have been getting a bit of grief from the rest of the crew.

Today we started cleaning drains with a digger.

With great glee they watched as the first bucket of stinking ooze sloshed into the tray and streamed down the sides.



Sunday, November 20, 2005

So very true .....


Saturday, November 19, 2005

Deadlier Than The Male

You are standing on the road with a stop/go paddle.
You have signs, arrows, and cones blocking a lane.
A car comes around the corner oblivious to everything
It hasn't slowed down at all.
It will almost certainly be driven by a woman.
Usually there will be two in the car.

Men will mostly drive through a work site too fast
But they usually notice what is going on
It's probably the boy, truck, curiosity, thing.

It is the women that scare you.
and it happens all the time.

Thursday, November 17, 2005

Flame Out.

A little too much dynamite perhaps?

What Do You Do With A Burning Coal Face?

You Cart It Away!

In your hot set of wheels....

Wednesday, November 16, 2005

Park, .. Click, .. Fine

You think parking is a hassle in the city now?
Well just wait.
The fine Mr. Sticker, purveyor of parking tickets to the gentry, and scourge of the over-stayers, has just let us in on what the new technology is doing in London.
" Recently released (10th November) CCTV Licence plate recognition software could just put me and these aching feet out of a job....."

I bet we have some bureaucrat here drooling over glossy brochures right now...

The Worst Words In English ... (1)


Tuesday, November 15, 2005

Right, ... Off To The Pub ...

"DUBLIN (Reuters) - A nursing home in Ireland has hit on a cheering way to keep up the spirits of its elderly patients -- by providing its own pub.

St Mary's Hospital in County Monaghan, near the Irish border with Northern Ireland, believes ready access to a good pint may help its patients -- average age 85 -- actually live longer.

"We would say the whole social aspect of life does extend the years -- it means the patients aren't bored to death," Rose Mooney, assistant director of nursing told Reuters.

The pub, which opens at 11 a.m. and closes at 9 p.m. and charges normal bar prices, had also led to an increase in the number of visitors, she said.

Having its own bar made the hospital, which has around 140 patients, unique in Ireland, she added. "

This has to be a stroke of genius. Mind you a good pub brawl might take a while, and the topless barmaids might be a bit rough.

Monday, November 14, 2005

Pimping My Ride

I took my truck for it's first service today.
It is now officially weaned, and will eat solids from now on.

I've also been thinking about "pimping my ride".

The trucks at our New Plymouth depot are devoid of anything other than company logos.
They look a bit sanitary.

Our Northern Depot has a fleet with decals of little squiggles and pinstriping on them.
Some of them are a tad overdone, but I like them.

Mind you I did once drive around in a bus that had "We Have Come For Your Daughters" across the front, and "God is a 50ft jelly bean" across the back, so my taste could be a bit questionable...


Friday, November 11, 2005

Most of my computor hassles have been solved with Google and a hammer.
Lot's of coffee and mumbling seems to help too.
The last few days though my Monitor refused to wake up from it's power saving snooze.
I tried hot boots
I tried cold boots
I nearly tried hob nailed boots.
So I ignored it for a day or two, and then sneaked up on it and booted it up again.
And it worked.

Today we replaced a guardrail at a corner with a deadly and macabre history.
It had been damaged by a semi that jack-knifed, fortunately with no injuries.
In 1995 a car left the road on this corner, killing an asian couple, when the vehicle landed in a small but flooded stream.
A police dive team searching the stream found another car with two men in it that had left the road 4 days before.
The two men had been away on a bit of a jaunt, and had not been missed.
There is a little a little memorial plaque behind my two work-mates, placed by the family of the asian couple, and two of the crosses commemorate the earlier crash.
This corner did not have a guardrail then, and has since been widened, and given better visibility.
When you look at the tiny stream, it is hard to believe that it turned killer.

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Tuesday, November 08, 2005


The Awakino Tunnel can be a bit of a problem for wide loads.
A large piece of cooling equipment bound for Motunui tried and failed to get through today.

After an attempt, the convoy turned around and headed off on another route which will add hours to their journey.
They seemed a bit grumpy about it too..


Monday, November 07, 2005

So There ....


Sunday, November 06, 2005

Huge number of birthday candles creates firestorm.

Wildlife flees inferno. Property damage in zillions.

Global warming, now odds on.

Ancient perpetrator flees to pub.

Saturday, November 05, 2005

"It was a try you know...."

In a few hours we face the Welsh Dragon.

It's 100 years since that 1905 test.

""slap the hands against the thighs . . . stamp the feet as hard as you can"

Go The All Blacks!

Cracker Days

Rockets, crackers, and loud explosions have always rather excited me.
At school I had an early interest in explosive demolition.

The fireworks of today are a pale shadow of the explosive devices of my era.
The best were "Star" crackers. They were the size of a Double Happy, but packed a lot more punch.
8 of them taped together made a very satisfying explosion, and would demolish a letter box.

There were sky rockets which could just about bring down an aircraft, and set whole hillsides ablaze.
Big Bangers with tarry wicks, and "Throwdowns", which were hurled and exploded on contact.

Guy Fawkes night was a huge exciting buzz, as the oldies partied, we blew each other up, and the fire brigade raced to and fro.

To top it off, it was, and is, my birthday the following day, so pissed Uncles would slip me a few bucks.

Alas, skyrockets are now banned, and there is talk of a total cracker ban.

I bet it's the Insurance Companies.

Let's blow them up.

Friday, November 04, 2005

Money Making Scheme No. 4675

"Seen our daughter? "
"Um, ... No, ... must have gone to the shops"

Just down the road from Casa Fart, there is a small shelter the local kids use as a shelter when waiting for the school bus.
When I arrived home today from my weary toil, the sight above greeted me.
A truck trailer has taken out a sign and the front of the shelter.
What would have happened had the kids been hanging around in front of it as usual, just doesn't bear thinking about.

Thursday, November 03, 2005

Xtra Generous..

"You currently pay $69.95 per month, but from your next Telecom bill, you'll only pay $59.95 per month and still enjoy your 10GB high-speed allowance every month. Nothing else will change and you don't have to do anything to get this new reduced price."


Wednesday, November 02, 2005

A quiet news day ?

" DRIVER Jason Evans was fined £150 and got three penalty points — after going through a PUDDLE.

Jason accidentally splashed a road worker on a verge as he drove through the 2ins deep floodwater at about 10mph.

A police patrol saw him and tailed his Vauxhall Vectra for two miles before nicking him.

He was hauled before JPs in Yeovil, Somerset, and admitted inconsiderate driving.
Dad-of-one Jason, 34, said: “I couldn’t believe it. I didn’t really notice the men until I passed by and saw one in the wing-mirror swearing and raising his fist... "

The Sun

Workers cutting the grade along the Brackett Wagon Road on Porcupine Hill, Alaska, August 6, 1898.

From an amazing collection of Gold Rush Photographs by Eric A. Hegg
via Goodshit

Tuesday, November 01, 2005

Power Of The Paddle.

So you are on traffic control at an accident site.
There is a chance to let banked up traffic through. You have to cut it off somewhere though.
My mate at the other end does.
When eventually he lets another lot through, who had he stopped...

The Associate Minister of Energy.


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Male. Lives in New Zealand/North Island/The Road, speaks English. Eye color is blue.
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