A little pick me up ....

When I was at a tender age, I could party non stop.

There would be brief spells of unconsciousness, but a hearty liquid breakfast would see me up and rocking again.

Now, alas, there are brief spells of partying and longer spells of unconsciousness.

This is a shame.

Whats the point of having a hobby if you keep nodding off all the time ?

I'm obviously out of condition.

Perhaps I need to give one of those Tour de France people a ring.

If I got caught up in a blood doping scandal, I wouldn't muck about riding bikes up mountains.

Waste of a good scandal.

It would be the fleshpots & vice dens of State Highway 3, for this raver ...

NZ Man Drought & Welsh Black Breeders...

Tomorrow a mate of mine is getting married.

In his cow shed.

No it is not animal husbandry in action.

The blushing bride is all woman.

He seems to have put his foot down and said if he was going to get married, it would be in his cowshed.
So he is.

Best gumboots, though.

Cowsheds are obviously places that encourage lust, sex and depravity...

"A young woman's naked table-top dance in a cattle shed at the Royal Welsh Show has led to an official inquiry.

Witnesses said the woman was hosed down during the performance with water normally used to wash and feed the cattle.
One witness, who did not want to be named, said security guards rushed to the scene late on Tuesday, but had difficulty grabbing the woman because the water had made her skin slippery.
Another said the woman's thong, discarded during the act, was returned to her on the end of a pitch fork used to muck out the cattle lines.
She said most Welsh Black breeders had been "annoyed and upset".

We will be partying hard, in our Kiwi cowshed.

The Welsh have never beaten us in an after match function ...

I better take a pair of new rubber gloves.

That should sort out the "slippery skin" problem....

Close Shave

This morning a trailer overturned on a sharp corner north of the Awakino Gorge Tunnel.

As truck accidents go, this was an easy one.

He was loaded with baled wood shavings, used as calf bedding.
The bales are relatively light and could be man handled, and a light crane popped the trailer back onto it's wheels.

They had a magic truck that could drop it's container onto the road to be loaded.
So it all went smoothly, on a nice sunny morning...

Sign Language

A while back the fax machine spat out a works order...

"Please remove all non frangible signs at RP/ XX .... "

We all looked at each other in the office.

As the tech wizard that even has a web page, and of course, member of the Uruti Trivial Pursuit Champion team of 1995, I am supposed to know what "non frangible" means.

Naturally I stalled until I could have a chat with Google.

Fortunately in that case the Boss knew what it was all about, and we gleefully removed some police signs of the "Don't Speed" variety.

A frangible sign is designed to break on impact.

To replace a damaged sign of any size is a major job.

We need our all purpose crane ...

You also need a calm day. Even in a light wind they can become unmanageable.

It was a storm that broke this one.

The base is designed to break away in a vehicle impact.

You have to align everything perfectly to get it up and secured.

Job done ...

Putting Safety First

I seem to have been designated safety rep for our depot while I was on holiday.

I have a few ideas to put to the Company.

It is a fact that the more hours you work, the more likely you are to be involved in something that hurts.

The safest thing to do therefore, is as little work as possible.

Statistics don't lie ...

Hot Hits

While the Northern Hemisphere are frolicking in a heat wave, it's still a bit frosty here in the mornings.

Still a nice day to be back at work when it warmed up a bit.

I saw a couple of lambs today, and calving has started.

Getting lighter in the mornings too.

I'm going to miss it when I become a rock star ...

make your own

Wakey, Wakey!

No sleep in tomorrow.

It's back to work.

The pots will be cowering in their holes.

I know you users of State Highway 3 will be breathing a collective sigh of relief, but I was just getting used to a life of sloth leisure.

Suppose I better mow the lawn ...

Free Money

PSSSST!

Wanna make a hundred bucks ?

Search Engine ?

Interesting people around Spike's way.

I see a NZ sticker there too....

Ripples....

There has been a bit of Google activity searching this blog for any mention of the sole charge Mokau Policeman.
One of the searchers works for a Sunday paper.

I know why.

Any serious accident can cause dislocation, grief, undreamt of circumstances and life changing events.
The ripples of fate spread wide.

This story from the Daily News (link down) will give you some of the aftermath of the fatal accident a couple of weeks ago in Mokau.

"No one would utter a bad word against him.
Constable Jono Erwood was just plain Jono to Mokau residents, who yesterday described the suspended policeman as a "bloody good bloke".
News had already spread in the seaside town that Mr Erwood was allegedly drink-driving when he attended the double fatality car crash on Sunday.
Mokau's police station was closed and it was difficult to miss the two unmarked police cars which hovered in the town's main street yesterday.
Mr Erwood was at home with his two children, but refused to comment on his positive breath test that was taken at the scene of the crash."Sorry, I have taken legal advice and I can't say anything," he said.
However, residents had plenty to say about the constable who has lived among them for the past five years."He's a bloody good bloke who puts other people first. He puts anyone before himself, especially the community," said Awakino Hotel co-owner Margaret Bell.
Drink-driving was not tolerated among Mokau residents, Ms Bell said, and Jono was no exception. But, he was a well-liked member of the community who always put others first."I would prefer to have 1000 blokes like him looking after me and know that he's going to turn up . . . than have one guy who didn't give a stuff," she said.
Mokau farmer David Black was at the crash site and yesterday defended the sole-charge policeman."What was he supposed to do? He's first response, he's got the oxygen . . .he's not going to sit there twiddling his thumbs," Mr Black said. "He is immensely respected in this community and this community as a whole will support him."
Even the family of one of the dead drivers were in support of Mr Erwood.
Peter Ratima's brother Clint died in the crash and had been playing golf with Mr Erwood earlier in the day."I hope he doesn't get into any trouble because when it comes down to it,it's not his fault," Peter Ratima said.
Sunday's accident happened only metres from Seaview Holiday Park, at Mokau,and managers Bill and Jean Miles were at the crash scene minutes after it occurred."He was sitting in his car and he never came out to talk to me, and I thought that was strange," Mrs Miles said, recalling the events on Sunday evening.
Mr Erwood was the first policemen to arrive at the crash site and he wore his fluorescent police vest."The police are interviewing everyone. We were told there was a criminal investigation going on . . . now it all makes sense."
Mr Ratima's dog Heiny also died in the crash."

"Community rallies behind constable 12 July 2006 Taranaki Daily News"

There will be no happy ending to this story.

Errors of judgement have been made, but very human ones, from the best of all motives.

I hope the Sunday's don't crucify him and his family.

Northern Exposure

Scallops being unloaded
Whitianga

" Southwest 20 knots rising to 30 knots gusting 40 knots for a time in the morning"

Alas, The crayfish are still on the reef, hanging on for grim death in a 3 metre swell.

Nothing for it but to gobble scallops instead.

And drink beer, lot's of beer.

I had planned on getting a lot of photo's but my camera got very drunk.

I'm not well, I must away to the couch ...

Nature Calls ...

I'm off to visit the Edwards for a couple of days.

I hope to dine well.

Just talk amoungst yourselves while I'm away ...

The Management Requests ...

mobster threat generator

My Space

Apparently the first parking meter was introduced 71 years ago, today, in Oklahoma City.

It was invented by Carl Magee;

" ..a lying, un-American political harlot, fatheaded imbecile remittance man, dirty cowardly reprobate, wicked, wanton, false, malicious, dishonest, corrupt, unscrupulous, and worse than the assassin of President McKinley."

He can't have been all that bad, he shot and winged a judge.

It was either a poor shot, or the Judge's time hadn't expired....

A word of warning ...

It is never a good idea to pull the dryer to bits, fix a plumbing leak, tinker with a motorbike, and muck about with BIOS setups at same time....

Especially when in the midst of such endeavours, a young couple crash through the fence opposite your house, with complete disregard for roadworker's holidays.

Now where did that bit go again...?

Wot I Did On My Holidays... Day 3

I've been pottering.

It's a great thing to do.

I have looked at lots of jobs around Fart Towers, and even done a few of them.

The important ones, - putting new speakers in the car, pumping up the tyre on the wheelbarrow, and sitting on the motorbike.

Tomorrow I plan on looking at a few more.


It is very odd not seeing the truck sitting out there.

I hope the workshop are toiling away with due reverence.

I left them a long list of things...

page 2

Also;

During high speed manoeuvring, the billiard table slides dangerously close to the fireplace, and the leather sofa.
My Van Gogh & Rembrandt paintings are also at risk from the poorly mounted Aquarium, which is also threatening my Persian rugs.

The Wine Cellar is running a tad hot, and the radar is affecting the satellite down link, which pisses off the cook in the galley as she cant watch her soap operas.

(Normally this wouldnt be a problem, but as Cindy Crawford keeps telling me, its hard to find a supermodel that can cook)

Oh & she needs a grease. The truck that is... Cindy is well serviced.

Cone Of Silence

Outside my gate there lives a traffic cone.
It's handy if you are guiding lost visitors.

It also is a subtle signal to the truckies and fire brigade that I am in residence.
A truck horn, or blip on a siren, and I can stumble out at some ungodly hour to deal with rocks on the road, or attend an accident.

It works surprisingly well.
My boss has called me out to find I am long gone.
I can always ring for the cavalry.

There is a risk of false alarms. The CB is handy here, a quick quizzing of any truckie and you know if there is a problem.

There is also a risk that the incident won't be reported officially, in which case neither the company or I get paid, though I can call something in myself.

If any of you Kiwi's out there do come across a slip, tree, accident, run away horse, or other road problem call the police.

It can take a while for action to happen as the alert works it's way through the system, but it does work.

So does my cone.

Today, day 1 of my holiday, I brought my cone inside the gate.

Well I had to do something to get off the couch ....

Besides, that makes it official.

Rest Area

I have accumulated a fair bit of leave.

My truck has to go away for some warranty repairs and some titivation.
I need to be able to carry a bit more in the way of signs, cones, etc.

So we are both going on holiday

Suddenly too, I feel so bloody tired.

I plan to stare at the wall for a couple of days, and have lots of naps.

Then I might go and work with a mate on a cray boat for a week.

But, Hey, I'll be around...

Seaview Crash

There was a very nasty fatal accident yesterday, just north of Mokau.
It has made the front page of the local paper.
(link probably short term)
The crew were up a lot of the night cleaning up, and the road was closed for some time.
We feel it when something like this happens on our patch.
To my eyes, this one looks as if it was caused by speed & running wide on a corner.
Ironically this happened at the end of a stretch of road that has recently been upgraded, but that leads into a blind corner.
We can make roads better & safer.
We can't stop bad driving.

International Call Out.

Sounds like I better warm up the truck...

"A vast chunk of Europe's most ill-famed mountain threatens to break loose and crash down in the next few days, a geologist monitoring the situation told the Guardian on Friday.

Hans-Rudolf Keusen said 2m cubic metres of the Eiger in the Bernese Alps, Switzerland - twice the volume of the Empire State Building - was rapidly working its way loose. He said the mountain appeared to have cracked open as an indirect result of global warming."

I don't think it's global warming though,
more likely all that bloody yodelling ....

Craig's Personal Potholes

Piopio Ambulance Depot

We Scorpio's never forget...

"Can you find one with significance to Ambulance? It would just mean that much more to me..."

No problem Craig.

Two even!

But maybe you could give the other one to a colleague, even if he is a Pommie !

Anyway, big thumbs ups to the ambulance crews, you all do an amazing job.

Winter

It's bloody awful being a roadworker at the moment.
We have scheduled jobs to do that must be done, rain or no rain.
We have also been scuttling about clearing slips & debris, nothing major yet, but the ground is saturated and the rivers high.

In fact you would be mad to be travelling at the moment, unless you had a really,really, hot date.

As the traffic threads it's way around you, and you peer at them through the rain, water trickling down your neck, boots sodden. You see the bored kids in the back, the white clenched, tense faces.
You think "whats so important? ... Why come out here?... Bugger off to your warm homes... Are you mad?

But there is hope
This afternoon, I turned around and saw this.

It made my day.

Go For Throttle Up

It seems as if I could be in the forefront of a revolution.

"Motorbike sales are rocketing as New Zealanders turn their backs on cars to combat the soaring cost of fuel."

And Attu has turned me on to a young chappie who is living his dream ...

Check this site out with the sound up at mach 10.

Think I might just wander out to the shed, sit on it, and make brrm brrm noises ...

Heavy News

"Freight volumes are expected to double over the next 15 years, with road transport tipped to pick up the lion's share of the increase, a report says."


Our Highway in fifteen years ....


Doddery in fifteen years ...

One for Bill ...

Kung-Fu Sisters Of No Mercy...

"Nuns thwart convent burglary"

"Nuns at the Nazareth House convent in Christchurch didn't wait for divine intervention when a female burglar raided the convent on the day of the Lord - they caught her and held her until police arrived.

Police say the 34-year-old woman, who has since been charged with two burglaries, allegedly entered the convent about 11.45am on Sunday.

After she took wallets and personal property from unoccupied rooms, she was challenged by sisters and staff of the convent.

Although she became "agitated and violent", Senior Sergeant Rob Patterson said, the sisters were able to restrain her.

The woman has been charged with burglary of Nazareth House and another house burglary, also yesterday morning, in Avonside, and has been remanded in custody.

The nuns have asked not to be requested for comment. "

Temptations ...

I had a flirtation with motorbikes when I was a teenage hoon.

I had a thumping great AJS for a while.

I gave up my fascination for them while airborne after hitting a small flock of sheep.

I was doing some prodigious speed on the way to the pub and was wearing summer clothes and sandals.

I hurtled into a corner after a long straight and there were half a dozen romney ewes huddled in the middle of the road.

I missed the first couple, but the third & fourth sent me airborne.

While in the air I realized the landing was going to seriously hurt. I also decided that if I survived I would give up motorbikes .

Then I landed.

I skidded across the corner leaving quite a bit of skin on the road and ended up in the verge, bleeding and stunned.

I was lucky. A few stitches and bruises were the outcome.

I put motorbikes into the heroin category.

Don't try them, you might like them too much...


The other day a mate gave me a motorbike.

I have to get it going, but as he says it is a screamer.

It looks as if it's doing a ton standing still.

Get thee behind me Satan ...

Tight Corners

Working in tight places can be a bit stressful for everybody.

The truckies too.

A second later the cone was flattened by the trailing wheels of the articulated trailer on this truck.

We are all working with one eye on the traffic, and you stand and work so you can see them.

You also keep an eye on your workmates, it is easy to get absorbed in what you are doing and maybe step the wrong way.

Fill

I suppose we get easy (2)